Today I woke up feeling a little sad, I’m not really sure why, since I really have no good reason to be. These past few months have been the greatest, happiest, most exciting months of my life, but studying abroad isn’t solely filled with amazing adventures and cool Instagram pics to prove it. They have also been the most challenging, eye opening months of my 21 years. I have been forced to reevaluate my outlook on life, the kind of person I want to be, how I view myself and the world, and what constitutes happiness. I figured it was as good a day as any to post some things that I’ve realized over the past two months that I think are crucial for any college student (or anyone in general) to be reminded of from time to time.
1.Stop thinking of after graduation as “the real world.”
I have always hated when people imply that life before graduation isn't "real." Sure, we don’t have as many responsibilities now as we will have someday soon, but that doesn’t mean our world is fake. We’re all trying to deal with growing up, finding ourselves, and figuring out our place in the world. At the same time I know countless people who are doing unbelievable things from research, to volunteering, to starting their own charities and companies. What you’re doing right now matters, don’t ever let anyone make you feel like it doesn’t.
2.Don’t let boys be mean to you.
For all my ladies out there. Let’s stop letting boys treat us any less than we deserve. You are just as good, if not better than any boy. And why are we always waiting around for them to text us first?
3.Stop caring about how many Instagram likes you get.
Why do we care anyway? I think I could write an entire book about how toxic social media can be. We all (myself included) need to stop using social media for self-gratification. Stop deleting pictures that “don’t get enough likes.” Realize that what people post on social media is only surface deep. Just like the way we filters our pictures, we can easily filter how other people perceive our lives. Perfect example: I’ve been posting lots of pics of my awesome travels, but there was never an insta post when my host mom fed me sardines for lunch, or when I got tragic news from back home. Remember this is true for everyone.
4.You can’t change anyone, you can only change yourself.
So let’s stop trying. You can change the way you react to others, the way you treat others, whom you surround yourself with, and the way you view differences, but it isn't right or fair to try to change someone else.
5.Open your eyes.
In Spain, I can only use my phone with Wi-Fi. Therefore, I’ve been forced to walk everywhere without my head in my phone. And wow. The world’s pretty interesting. Try it sometime.
6.Do what you want, not what you think other people want you to do.
We get so wrapped up in doing what we think we should do, that we ignore doing what we really want to. Do what’s going to make you happy, and more importantly, do things for yourself, not for the sake of others. Major in what you love to do, not what will make you the most money. If you’re not passionate about what you’re doing, it’s not worth wasting your time and it’s never going to make you any happier. Furthermore, do things because you want to, because working to impress others will never feel as gratifying as doing it for yourself.
7.Be present.
Enjoy the people you’re with. Stop texting at the dinner table. Engage in conversation. Appreciate what you have, and what is right in front of you.
8.Love yourself first.
It is getting so utterly exhausting to engage in so much self-hate. I’ve realized society is always going to be telling us, “You’re not pretty enough,” “you’re not thin enough,” “you’re not good enough, smart enough, etc. etc. etc.” Well society can get over itself because frankly, all of this is getting ridiculous. A person is made up of so much more than what we see on the outside. What if we started judging attractiveness based on how people treat others? I’m tired of focusing on everything I don’t like about myself, and the second I started making an effort to be happy in my own skin was the second I started to feel at peace.
9.What you do everyday matters more than what you do once in a while.
Be kind always. Don’t do nice things because you want something in return. Your friends are gifts-treat them like it Surround yourself with people who lift you up, and do the same for others. Family is forever the most important.
10.Don’t apologize for who you are.
Some of the coolest people I have ever met have been completely, unapologetically true to themselves and that’s awesome. Be who you want to be, not who the world wants you to be.
11.It’s ok to not be ok.
You never know what the person sitting next to you is going through, and everyone is fighting their own battles. Talk about things, ask for help, know you're not alone and try to find something good in each day – I promise once you start looking you’ll find much more good than you think. Side note: a Chipotle Burrito bowl typically makes any bad day better for me. Just saying.
1.Stop thinking of after graduation as “the real world.”
I have always hated when people imply that life before graduation isn't "real." Sure, we don’t have as many responsibilities now as we will have someday soon, but that doesn’t mean our world is fake. We’re all trying to deal with growing up, finding ourselves, and figuring out our place in the world. At the same time I know countless people who are doing unbelievable things from research, to volunteering, to starting their own charities and companies. What you’re doing right now matters, don’t ever let anyone make you feel like it doesn’t.
2.Don’t let boys be mean to you.
For all my ladies out there. Let’s stop letting boys treat us any less than we deserve. You are just as good, if not better than any boy. And why are we always waiting around for them to text us first?
3.Stop caring about how many Instagram likes you get.
Why do we care anyway? I think I could write an entire book about how toxic social media can be. We all (myself included) need to stop using social media for self-gratification. Stop deleting pictures that “don’t get enough likes.” Realize that what people post on social media is only surface deep. Just like the way we filters our pictures, we can easily filter how other people perceive our lives. Perfect example: I’ve been posting lots of pics of my awesome travels, but there was never an insta post when my host mom fed me sardines for lunch, or when I got tragic news from back home. Remember this is true for everyone.
4.You can’t change anyone, you can only change yourself.
So let’s stop trying. You can change the way you react to others, the way you treat others, whom you surround yourself with, and the way you view differences, but it isn't right or fair to try to change someone else.
5.Open your eyes.
In Spain, I can only use my phone with Wi-Fi. Therefore, I’ve been forced to walk everywhere without my head in my phone. And wow. The world’s pretty interesting. Try it sometime.
6.Do what you want, not what you think other people want you to do.
We get so wrapped up in doing what we think we should do, that we ignore doing what we really want to. Do what’s going to make you happy, and more importantly, do things for yourself, not for the sake of others. Major in what you love to do, not what will make you the most money. If you’re not passionate about what you’re doing, it’s not worth wasting your time and it’s never going to make you any happier. Furthermore, do things because you want to, because working to impress others will never feel as gratifying as doing it for yourself.
7.Be present.
Enjoy the people you’re with. Stop texting at the dinner table. Engage in conversation. Appreciate what you have, and what is right in front of you.
8.Love yourself first.
It is getting so utterly exhausting to engage in so much self-hate. I’ve realized society is always going to be telling us, “You’re not pretty enough,” “you’re not thin enough,” “you’re not good enough, smart enough, etc. etc. etc.” Well society can get over itself because frankly, all of this is getting ridiculous. A person is made up of so much more than what we see on the outside. What if we started judging attractiveness based on how people treat others? I’m tired of focusing on everything I don’t like about myself, and the second I started making an effort to be happy in my own skin was the second I started to feel at peace.
9.What you do everyday matters more than what you do once in a while.
Be kind always. Don’t do nice things because you want something in return. Your friends are gifts-treat them like it Surround yourself with people who lift you up, and do the same for others. Family is forever the most important.
10.Don’t apologize for who you are.
Some of the coolest people I have ever met have been completely, unapologetically true to themselves and that’s awesome. Be who you want to be, not who the world wants you to be.
11.It’s ok to not be ok.
You never know what the person sitting next to you is going through, and everyone is fighting their own battles. Talk about things, ask for help, know you're not alone and try to find something good in each day – I promise once you start looking you’ll find much more good than you think. Side note: a Chipotle Burrito bowl typically makes any bad day better for me. Just saying.